Here's a sneak peek into Paint Me Beautiful. I just posted a review here, go check it out!
I set my phone down and get dressed in yet another set of workout clothes. It's surprising how many sets I have, most of them brand new since I've never really been much of a fitness guru. I imagine that my lack of exercise is part of the equation that ended up leaving me a fat mess, but I try to think past that, try to make up for it by killing myself with a new workout routine. I only make it ten minutes before I have to stop and take a break. In my mind, I have to take a break because I'm overweight, too heavy to force myself through it. In reality, I'm starving to death.
I'm dying to be beautiful, and I don't even know it.
Emmett does though. He does, and he wants to help me, but even he doesn't quite realize that the only way he can help me is if I want to help myself first. I start up the routine again and can only make it through a single set of crunches before I'm rolling onto my side, wheezing and clutching my aching tummy. It causes me to double over and curl into a fetal position, but only because my muscles are sore and not because of food. I'm not hungry, not anymore. It's sort of amazing that I've broken my body's bad habit in just a few days. I tell it when I eat and not the other way around. I like that. Ten minutes and a whole water bottle later, I get up and try again. This time, I manage to make it to the end of the video and feel so damn proud that I reward myself by lying down on my bed to rest my eyes. When I open them, the sky is dark again and I'm shivering with cold.